My baby is sick :( I dunno what could i do, other than asking him to rest more, drink more water, eat medicine, sleep, put on blanket.. I wish i could be there, to take care of him. i feel so heartache when he called me in the middle of the night, because he got waken up by the cold and shivers. and i cant even do a single shit, and the only thing i said was, i'll hug you to keep u warm. How i wish, i'd graduated, how i wish i was in malaysia now. i feel so useless, like, really useless. im so sorry baby. i know i've disappointed you once again. get well soon baby. i'll be here :)

 Was reading our past messages yesterday, because i couldnt sleep. and i noticed that something have changed. It's not something bad, just feel like, maybe both of us have grown up lol. and i realized we were kinda cute back then haha. like kids teasing each other everyday. and i kinda miss that haha. baby, please get well soon, i wanna tease you like how i used to be, i wanna be grumpy whenever i want.. :p

As time passes by, a lot of thing around us changed. people change. im not surprised that she has changed. people said, she wants to be extraordinary and outstanding. ohwell. i've nothing to say about that, or rather, i dont give a fuck about that haha. 

shall start planning my so called one year break. people say, one year is so long, and u gonna waste ur one year. i know, but that's my only choice right now. i would want to continue studying right after graduation, but the thing is, i have no other choices anymore. 

you have no idea, how uneasy i feel whenever it comes to that topic, and i hate that shit. fts

pooiling.